温暖的眼神 Killer Angels

佚名/Anonymous

I had just graduated from veterinary school, and I was volunteering at the local shelter in Twin Falls, Idaho. As I looked down at the dog napping in her run, I knew I was going to have to wake her up to put her to sleep. What a cruel euphemism.

She was a Heinz-57 mixed-breed with no name, no home, and no hope. She was horrifcally malnourished, and her coat was a mass of mats and burrs.

In a way, she was lucky to be here. Found on the side of the road-like living garbage-shed been left to die in a remote area of our county.

The kind rancher who found her brought her to the local shelter where she joined dozens of other cutiest and ugliest pressing against the front of the cages hoping to catch the eye of someone who had a heart and home big enough to give them another chance.

Problem was there were too many homeless pets and not enough homes. Day after day for a week the dog waited and waited, her still-wagging tail marking the time.

But on this day, her time was up. No one had adopted her, like many in the shelter, the animals were too big, too small, too hairy, too young, and too old. Without enough cages to hold all that came through our doors, we were prepared to end her life quickly and without suffering.“Better than starving to death in the country.”I said, fnding little solace in the words.

I was inspired to enter this profession because of a deep love of animals. I had been highly trained and entrusted to save lives and prevent pain and suffering. Yet here I was about to end the life of this innocent creature. I hated this part of the job, but I had to do it. Choking back my emotions, I readied myself to perform the procedure for which Id been trained.

I set her on the table, and she wiggled her gaunt frame with delight as I spoke some soothing words and patted her head. The tempo of her tail quickened as she looked up at my face. Looking into her eyes, I saw total trust, unconditional love and absolute loyalty. I felt the cruel irony of what was taking place. God‘s precious creatures, embodying the kindest virtues on the planet, being killed for the crime of not being wanted. She held out her leg for me to inject and licked my hand. She was ready. I wasn’t.

I collapsed onto the dog and held her tight as I bathed her with tears. Never, ever would I do convenience euthanasia again. I‘d euthanize a pet if it was suffering terribly, or had an incurable disease, but never again because of an uncaring owner’s mere request.

I took the dog back to my veterinary practice and named herG. H.short for Good Home. Id observed over the years that people who raised litters of puppies or kittens always said，“I just want to fnd them a good home.”

I soon entrusted G. H.to a loving client who had a heart and home big enough to welcome yet another four-legged family member.

Saving G. H.set me on a new path as a veterinarian. Although my hands still held the power of death, my heart didnt. Now, whenever I look into the dancing liquid eyes of a pet, brimming with love, I realize that looks can save. They did it to me.

从兽医学校毕业的那刻起，我就决定去爱达荷州双瀑市，在一家地方动物收容所做一名志愿者。看到眼前有狗在场子里打瞌睡，我就明白我得叫醒她，然后让她“入睡”。这样说真是既委婉又残酷！

这是只海因茨-57杂种狗，没有名字，也没有家，更没有生存的希望。她严重营养不良，毛长得像一团乱麻。

从某种程度上讲，能待在这里对她来说已经算是幸运的了。要不是人们在路边发现她——当时她就像一团活垃圾——她很可能会死在我们县城的某个僻静角落。

一个善良的农场工发现了她，把她送到了当地的动物收容所。在这里，她加入了其他动物的行列。这些动物有的美丽可人，有的丑陋不堪，但个个都挤到笼子前，希望那些既有钱又好心的人多看自己几眼，好让他们再次得到收养。

但问题是，流浪的宠物太多，而且很少有人愿意收养他们。小狗等了整整一周，尾巴不停地摆来摆去，而时间也随着她尾巴的摆动渐渐消逝。

但是今天她要告别这个世界了。像收容所里的其他动物一样，一直没有人收养她，这些动物要么个儿太大，要么个儿太小，要么毛太多，要么太幼小或者太老。因为没有足够的笼子装所有被送进来的动物，我们要让她迅速地、毫无痛苦地结束生命。“这样总比在乡下饿死好。”从这句话里，我也多少找到了安慰。

因为深爱动物，我才从事现在的工作。学校教育以及自身的责任感教会我要挽救他们的生命，减缓他们的痛苦与折磨，然而现在我却要终止这个无辜的小生命。我痛恨这个工作，但我必须这样做。我克制住自己，准备开始执行这个我训练过的程序。

我把她抱到桌上，安慰了她几句，又轻轻地拍了拍她的脑袋，她高兴地扭动起那瘦骨嶙峋的身子。她抬起头，望着我，尾巴摇摆得越来越快，眼神中透露出完全的信任、无条件的爱和绝对的忠诚。我感到自己正在做一件残忍的事。上帝把生命赋予这些生灵，他们有着世间最善良的品德，但因为无家可归而被残杀。她把腿伸出让我打针，又舔了舔我的手。她已经准备好了，而我却没有。

我的精神彻底崩溃了，我扑过去紧紧地抱着她，我哭了，泪水打湿了她的身体。永远，我永远不会再给这些动物实施安乐死了。我再也不会因为他们没有主人的关心而对他们实行安乐死，除非他们正遭受病痛的折磨，或是得了不治之症。

我将小狗带回兽医站，给她起了个名字叫G.H.——美好的家（Good Home）的缩写。多年来，我发现小狗小猫的主人经常说：“我只想给他们找一个美好的家。”

很快，我把G.H.送给了一个善良的主人，他很仁慈，家里很宽敞，因此作为这个家四条腿的成员，她很受欢迎。

救助G.H.也使得一条新的道路出现在我的兽医生涯中。尽管我仍然执掌着“生杀”大权，但我没有那种念头。现在，只要一看到他们那充满爱意和神采飞扬的眼睛，我就懂得，眼神能够拯救一个人，而他们用自己的眼神拯救了我。

心灵小语

今天她要告别这个世界了，而我却要减缓他们的痛苦与折磨，终止这个无辜的小生命。不过，当然，你们知道最后的结局，他们用自己的眼神拯救了我。

W词汇笔记

euphemism[ju：fəmIzəm]n.婉言；委婉的说法

例Pass away is a euphemism for die.

去世是死的委婉说法。

solace[sa：ləs]n.安慰

例His work has been a real solace to him.

他从工作中得到莫大的慰藉。

procedure[prəsi：dʒə]n.程序；手续；步骤

例He suggested a new procedure in the meeting.

他在会上提出了新的议事程序。

collapse[kəlæps]v.倒塌；崩溃；瓦解

例The whole building collapsed.

整个建筑倒塌了。

S小试身手

上帝把生命赋予这些生灵，他们有着世间最善良的品德。

译________________________________________

因为深爱动物，我才从事现在的工作。

译________________________________________

救助G.H.也使得一条新的道路出现在我的兽医生涯中。

译________________________________________

P短语家族

The kind rancher who found her brought her to the local shelter where she joined dozens of other cutiest.

dozens of：很多；几十

造________________________________________

……brimming with love, I realize that looks can save. brim with：洋溢着；充满着

造________________________________________