第20章 CHAPTER V.(5)
Wilkins was strongly tempted to accede to them at once;as Ellinor's pale cheek and want of appetite had only that very morning smote upon his conscience,and this immediate transfer of ready money was as a sacrifice,a soothing balm to his self-reproach,and laziness and dislike to immediate unpleasantness of action had its counterbalancing weakness in imprudence.Mr.Wilkins made some rough calculations on a piece of paper--deeds,and all such tests of accuracy,being down at the office;discovered that he could pay down the sum required;wrote a letter agreeing to the proposal,and before he sealed it called Ellinor into his study,and bade her read what he had been writing and tell him what she thought of it.He watched the colour come rushing into her white face,her lips quiver and tremble,and even before the letter was ended she was in his arms kissing him,and thanking him with blushing caresses rather than words.
"There,there!"said he,smiling and sighing;"that will do.Why,Ido believe you took me for a hard-hearted father,just like a heroine's father in a book.You've looked as woe-begone this week past as Ophelia.One can't make up one's mind in a day about such sums of money as this,little woman;and you should have let your old father have time to consider.""Oh,papa;I was only afraid you were angry.""Well,if I was a bit perplexed,seeing you look so ill and pining was not the way to bring me round.Old Corbet,I must say,is trying to make a good bargain for his son.It is well for me that I have never been an extravagant man.""But,papa,we don't want all this much.""Yes,yes!it is all right.You shall go into their family as a well-portioned girl,if you can't go as a Lady Maria.Come,don't trouble your little head any more about it.Give me one more kiss,and then we'll go and order the horses,and have a ride together,by way of keeping holiday.I deserve a holiday,don't I,Nelly?"Some country people at work at the roadside,as the father and daughter passed along,stopped to admire their bright happy looks,and one spoke of the hereditary handsomeness of the Wilkins family (for the old man,the present Mr.Wilkins's father,had been fine-looking in his drab breeches and gaiters,and usual assumption of a yeoman's dress).Another said it was easy for the rich to be handsome;they had always plenty to eat,and could ride when they were tired of walking,and had no care for the morrow to keep them from sleeping at nights.And,in sad acquiescence with their contrasted lot,the men went on with their hedging and ditching in silence.
And yet,if they had known--if the poor did know--the troubles and temptations of the rich;if those men had foreseen the lot darkening over the father,and including the daughter in its cloud;if Mr.
Wilkins himself had even imagined such a future possible ...Well,there was truth in the old heathen saying,"Let no man be envied till his death."Ellinor had no more rides with her father;no,not ever again;though they had stopped that afternoon at the summit of a breezy common,and looked at a ruined hall,not so very far off;and discussed whether they could reach it that day,and decided that it was too far away for anything but a hurried inspection,and that some day soon they would make the old place into the principal object of an excursion.
But a rainy time came on,when no rides were possible;and whether it was the influence of the weather,or some other care or trouble that oppressed him,Mr.Wilkins seemed to lose all wish for much active exercise,and rather sought a stimulus to his spirits and circulation in wine.But of this Ellinor was innocently unaware.He seemed dull and weary,and sat long,drowsing and drinking after dinner.If the servants had not been so fond of him for much previous generosity and kindness,they would have complained now,and with reason,of his irritability,for all sorts of things seemed to annoy him.
"You should get the master to take a ride with you,miss,"said Dixon,one day as he was putting Ellinor on her horse."He's not looking well,he's studying too much at the office."But when Ellinor named it to her father,he rather hastily replied that it was all very well for women to ride out whenever they liked--men had something else to do;and then,as he saw her look grave and puzzled,he softened down his abrupt saying by adding that Dunster had been making a fuss about his partner's non-attendance,and altogether taking a good deal upon himself in a very offensive way,so that he thought it better to go pretty regularly to the office,in order to show him who was master--senior partner,and head of the business,at any rate.
Ellinor sighed a little over her disappointment at her father's preoccupation,and then forgot her own little regret in anger at Mr.
Dunster,who had seemed all along to be a thorn in her father's side,and had latterly gained some power and authority over him,the exercise of which,Ellinor could not help thinking,was a very impertinent line of conduct from a junior partner,so lately only a paid clerk,to his superior.There was a sense of something wrong in the Ford Bank household for many weeks about this time.Mr.Wilkins was not like himself,and his cheerful ways and careless genial speeches were missed,even on the days when he was not irritable,and evidently uneasy with himself and all about him.The spring was late in coming,and cold rain and sleet made any kind of out-door exercise a trouble and discomfort rather than a bright natural event in the course of the day.All sound of winter gaieties,of assemblies and meets,and jovial dinners,had died away,and the summer pleasures were as yet unthought of.Still Ellinor had a secret perennial source of sunshine in her heart;whenever she thought of Ralph she could not feel much oppression from the present unspoken and indistinct gloom.He loved her;and oh,how she loved him!and perhaps this very next autumn--but that depended on his own success in his profession.After all,if it was not this autumn it would be the next;and with the letters that she received weekly,and the occasional visits that her lover ran down to Hamley to pay Mr.Ness,Ellinor felt as if she would almost prefer the delay of the time when she must leave her father's for a husband's roof.