第24章

She was like a deformed person who has always imagined the consideration he has had was natural and equal, and suddenly discovers that it is pity for his deformity.She now acutely felt her aunt's, her cousin's, dislike; and her uncle's gentleness was not less galling.In her softly rounded youthful face there was revealed definitely for the first time an underlying expression of strength, of what is often confused with its feeble counterfeit, obstinacy--that power to resist circumstances which makes the unusual and the firm character.

The young mobility of her features suggested the easy swaying of the baby sapling in the gentlest breeze.Singularly at variance with it was this expression of tenacity.Such an expression in the face of the young infallibly forecasts an agitated and agitating life.It seemed amazingly out of place in Susan because theretofore she had never been put to the test in any but unnoted trifles and so had given the impression that she was as docile as she was fearful of giving annoyance or pain and indifferent to having her own way.Those who have this temperament of strength encased in gentleness are invariably misunderstood.When they assert themselves, though they are in the particular instance wholly right, they are regarded as wholly and outrageously wrong.Life deals hardly with them, punishes them for the mistaken notion of themselves they have through forbearance and gentleness of heart permitted an unobservant world to form.

Susan spent the afternoon on the balcony before her window, reading and sewing--or, rather, dreaming over first a book, then a dress.When she entered the dining-room at supper time the others were already seated.She saw instantly that something had occurred--something ominous for her.Mrs.Warham gave her a penetrating, severe look and lowered her eyes; Ruth was gazing sullenly at her plate.Warham's glance was stern and reproachful.She took her place opposite Ruth, and the meal was eaten in silence.Ruth left the table first.Next Mrs.Warham rose and saying, "Susan, when you've finished, I wish to see you in the sitting-room upstairs," swept in solemn dignity from the room.Susan rose at once to follow.As she was passing her uncle he put out his hand and detained her.