Susan Lenox-Her Rise and Fall
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第115章

Etta's hand dropped from the knob."Well--what is it, Lorna?"she asked in a low, nervous tone.

"Look at me, dear."

Etta tried to obey, could not.

"Don't do it--yet," said Susan."Wait--a few more days.""Wait for what?"

"I don't know.But--wait."

"You get four, I get only three--and there's no chance of a raise.I work slower instead of faster.I'm going to be discharged soon.I'm in rags underneath....I've got to go before I get sick--and won't have anything to--to sell."Susan did not reply.She stared at the remains of a cheap stocking in her lap.Yes, there was no doubt about it, Etta's health was going.Etta was strong, but she had no such store of strength to draw upon as had accumulated for Susan during the seventeen years of simple, regular life in healthful surroundings.A little while and Etta would be ill--would, perhaps--probably--almost certainly--die--Dan Cassatt came in at the other door, sat on the edge of his bed and changed his trousers for what he was pleased to imagine a less disreputable pair.Midway the boy stopped and eyed Susan's bare leg and foot, a grin of pleasure and amusement on his precociously and viciously mature face.

"My, but you keep clean," he cried."And you've got a mighty pretty foot.Minnie's is ugly as hell."Minnie was the "fancy lady" on the floor below--"my skirt," he called her.Susan evidently did not hear his compliment.Dan completed his "sporting toilet" with a sleeking down of his long greasy hair, took himself away to his girl.Susan was watching a bug crawl down the wall toward their bed with its stained and malodorous covers of rag.Etta was still standing by the door motionless.She sighed, once more put her hand on the knob.

Susan's voice came again."You've never been out, have you?""No," replied Etta.

Susan began to put on her stocking."I'll go," said she."I'll go--instead.""No!" cried Etta, sobbing."It don't matter about me.I'm bound to be sucked under.You've got a chance to pull through.""Not a ghost of a chance," answered Susan."I'll go.You've never been.""I know, but----"

"You've never been," continued Susan, fastening her shoe with its ragged string."You've never been.Well--I have.""You!" exclaimed Etta, horrified though unbelieving."Oh, no, you haven't.""Yes," said Susan."And worse."

"And worse?" repeated Etta."Is that what the look I sometimes see in your eyes--when you don't know anyone's seeing--is that what it means?""I suppose so.I'll go.You stay here."

"And you--out there!"

"It doesn't mean much to me."

Etta looked at her with eyes as devoted as a dog's."Then we'll go together," she said.

Susan, pinning on her weather-stained hat, reflected."Very well," she said finally."There's nothing lower than this."They said no more; they went out into the clear, cold winter night, out under the brilliant stars.Several handsome theater buses were passing on their way from the fashionable suburb to the theater.Etta looked at them, at the splendid horses, at the men in top hats and fur coats--clean looking, fine looking, amiable looking men--at the beautiful fur wraps of the delicate women--what complexions!--what lovely hair!--what jewels! Etta, her heart bursting, her throat choking, glanced at Susan to see whether she too was observing.But Susan's eyes were on the tenement they had just left.

"What are you looking at--so queer?" asked Etta.

"I was thinking that we'll not come back here."Etta started."Not come back _home!_"

Susan gave a strange short laugh."Home!...No, we'll not come back home.There's no use doing things halfway.We've made the plunge.We'll go--the limit."Etta shivered.She admired the courage, but it terrified her.

"There's something--something--awful about you, Lorna," she said."You've changed till you're like a different person from what you were when you came to the restaurant.Sometimes--that look in your eyes--well, it takes my breath away.""It takes _my_ breath away, too.Come on."

At the foot of the hill they took the shortest route for Vine Street, the highway of the city's night life.

Though they were so young and walked briskly, their impoverished blood was not vigorous enough to produce a reaction against the sharp wind of the zero night which nosed through their few thin garments and bit into their bodies as if they were naked.They came to a vast department store.Each of its great show-windows, flooded with light, was a fascinating display of clothing for women upon wax models--costly jackets and cloaks of wonderful furs, white, brown, gray, rich and glossy black; underclothes fine and soft, with ribbons and flounces and laces; silk stockings and graceful shoes and slippers; dresses for street, for ball, for afternoon, dresses with form, with lines, dresses elegantly plain, dresses richly embroidered.Despite the cold the two girls lingered, going from window to window, their freezing faces pinched and purple, their eyes gazing hungrily.

"Now that we've tried 'em all on," said Susan with a short and bitter laugh, "let's dress in our dirty rags again and go.""Oh, I couldn't imagine myself in any of those things--could you?" cried Etta.

"Yes," answered Susan."And better."

"You were brought up to have those things, I know."Susan shook her head."But I'm going to have them.""When?" said Etta, scenting romance."Soon?""As soon as I learn," was Susan's absent, unsatisfactory reply.