第71章
Also, young and inexperienced women--and women not so young, and with opportunity to become less inexperienced but without the ability to learn by experience--always exaggerate the importance of passion.Almost without exception, it is by way of passion that a man and a woman approach each other.It is, of necessity, the exterior that first comes into view.Thus, all that youth and inexperience can know about love is its aspect of passion.
Because Jane had again and again in her five grown-up years experienced men falling passionately in love with her, she fancied she was an expert in matters of love.In fact, she had still everything to learn.
On the way home she, assuming that the affair was as good as settled, that she and Victor Dorn were lovers, was busy with plans for the future.Victor Dorn had made a shrewd guess at the state of her mind.She had no intention of allowing him to pursue his present career.That was merely foundation.With the aid of her love and council, and of her father's money and influence, he--he and she--would mount to something really worth while--something more than the petty politics of a third rate city in the West.Washington was the proper arena for his talents; they would take the shortest route to Washington.No trouble about bringing him around; a man so able and so sensible as he would not refuse the opportunity to do good on a grand scale.Besides--he must be got away from his family, from these doubtless good and kind but certainly not very high class associates of his, and from Selma Gordon.The idea of his comparing HER with Selma Gordon! He had not done so aloud, but she knew what was in his mind.Yes, he must be taken far away from all these provincial and narrowing associations.
But all this was mere detail.The big problem was how to bring her father round.He couldn't realize what Victor Dorn would be after she had taken him in hand.He would see only Victor Dorn, the labor agitator of Remsen City, the nuisance who put mischievous motives into the heads of ``the hands''--the man who made them think they had heads when they were intended by the Almighty to be simply hands.How reconcile him to the idea of accepting this nuisance, this poor, common member of the working class as a son-in-law, as the husband of the daughter he wished to see married to some one of the ``best'' families?
On the face of it, the thing was impossible.Why, then, did not Jane despair? For two reasons.In the first place, she was in love, and that made her an optimist.Somehow love would find the way.But the second reason--the one she hid from herself deep in the darkest sub-cellar of her mind, was the real reason.It is one matter to wish for a person's death.Only a villainous nature can harbor such a wish, can admit it except as a hastily and slyly in-crawling impulse, to be flung out the instant it is discovered.It is another matter to calculate--very secretly, very unconsciously--upon a death that seems inevitable anyhow.
Jane had only to look at her father to feel that he would not be spared to her long.The mystery was how he had kept alive so long, how he continued to live from day to day.His stomach was gone; his whole digestive apparatus was in utter disorder.His body had shriveled until he weighed no more than a baby.His pulse was so feeble that even in the hot weather he complained of the cold and had to be wrapped in the heaviest winter garments.
Yet he lived on, and his mind worked with undiminished vigor.
When Jane reached home, the old man was sitting on the veranda in the full sun.On his huge head was a fur cap pulled well down over his ears and intensifying the mortuary, skull-like appearance of his face.Over his ulster was an old-fashioned Scotch shawl such as men used to wear in the days before overcoats came into fashion.About his wasted legs was wrapped a carriage robe, and she knew that there was a hot-water bag under his feet.Beside him sat young Doctor Charlton, whom Jane had at last succeeded in inducing her father to try.Charlton did not look or smell like a doctor.He rather suggested a professional athlete, perhaps a better class prize fighter.The weazened old financier was gazing at him with a fascinated expression--admiring, envious, amused.
Charlton was saying:
``Yes, you do look like a dead one.But that's only another of your tricks for fooling people.You'll live a dozen years unless you commit suicide.A dozen years? Probably twenty.''
``You ought to be ashamed to make sport of a poor old invalid,''
said Hastings with a grin.
``Any man who could stand a lunch of crackers and milk for ten years could outlive anything,'' retorted Charlton.``No, you belong to the old stock.You used to see 'em around when you were a boy.They usually coughed and wheezed, and every time they did it, the family used to get ready to send for the undertaker.But they lived on and on.When did your mother die?''
``Couple of years ago,'' said Hastings.
``And your father?''
``He was killed by a colt he was breaking at sixty- seven.''
Charlton laughed uproariously.``If you took walks and rides instead of always sitting round, you never would die,'' said he.
``But you're like lots of women I know.You'd rather die than take exercise.Still, I've got you to stop that eating that was keeping you on the verge all the time.''
``You're trying to starve me to death,'' grumbled Hastings.
``Don't you feel better, now that you've got used to it and don't feel hungry?''
``But I'm not getting any nourishment.''
``How would eating help you? You can't digest any more than what I'm allowing you.Do you think you were better off when you were full of rotting food? I guess not.''
``Well--I'm doing as you say,'' said the old man resignedly.
``And if you keep it up for a year, I'll put you on a horse.If you don't keep it up, you'll find yourself in a hearse.''