第34章 VILLA RUBEIN(32)

"DEAR CHRIS,--We are here now six days, and it is a very large place with many churches.In the first place then we have been to a great many, but the nicest of them is not St.Stephan's Kirche, it is another, but I do not remember the name.Papa is out nearly all the night; he says he is resting here, so he is not able to come to the churches with us, but I do not think he rests very much.The day before yesterday we, that is, Papa, I, and Miss Naylor, went to an exhibition of pictures.It was quite beautiful and interesting (Miss Naylor says it is not right to say 'quite' beautiful, but I do not know what other word could mean 'quite' except the word 'quite,'

because it is not exceedingly and not extremely.And O Chris! there was one picture painted by him; it was about a ship without masts--Miss Naylor says it is a barge, but I do not know what a barge is--on fire, and, floating down a river in a fog.I think it is extremely beautiful.Miss Naylor says it is very impressionistick--what is that? and Papa said 'Puh!' but he did not know it was painted by Herr Harz, so I did not tell him.

"There has also been staying at our hotel that Count Sarelli who came one evening to dinner at our house, but he is gone away now.He sat all day in the winter garden reading, and at night he went out with Papa.Miss Naylor says he is unhappy, but I think he does not take enough exercise; and O Chris! one day he said to me, 'That is your sister, Mademoiselle, that young lady in the white dress? Does she always wear white dresses?' and I said to him: 'It is not always a white dress; in the picture, it is green, because the picture is called "Spring.'" But I did not tell him the colours of all your dresses because he looked so tired.Then he said to me: 'She is very charming.' So I tell you this, Chris, because I think you shall like to know.Scruff' has a sore toe; it is because he has eaten too much meat.

"It is not nice without you, Chris, and Miss Naylor says I am improving my mind here, but I do not think it shall improve very much, because at night I like it always best, when the shops are lighted and the carriages are driving past; then I am wanting to dance.The first night Papa said he would take me to the theatre, but yesterday he said it was not good for me; perhaps to-morrow he shall think it good for me again.

"Yesterday we have been in the Prater, and saw many people, and some that Papa knew; and then came the most interesting part of all, sitting under the trees in the rain for two hours because we could not get a carriage (very exciting).

"There is one young lady here, only she is not any longer very young, who knew Papa when he was a boy.I like her very much; she shall soon know me quite to the bottom and is very kind.

"The ill husband of Cousin Teresa who went with us to Meran and lost her umbrella and Dr.Edmund was so sorry about it, has been very much worse, so she is not here but in Baden.I wrote to her but have no news, so I do not know whether he is still living or not, at any rate he can't get well again so soon (and I don't think he ever shall).Ithink as the weather is very warm you and Uncle Nic are sitting much out of doors.I am sending presents to you all in a wooden box and screwed very firm, so you shall have to use again the big screw-driver of Fritz.For Aunt Constance, photographs; for Uncle Nic, a green bird on a stand with a hole in the back of the bird to put his ashes in; it is a good green and not expensif please tell him, because he does not like expensif presents (Miss Naylor says the bird has an inquiring eye--it is a parrat); for you, a little brooch of turquoise because I like them best; for Dr.Edmund a machine to weigh medicines in because he said he could not get a good one in Botzen;this is a very good one, the shopman told me so, and is the most expensif of all the presents--so that is all my money, except two gulden.If Papa shall give me some more, I shall buy for Miss Naylor a parasol, because it is useful and the handle of hers is 'wobbley'

(that is one of Dr.Edmund's words and I like it).

"Good-bye for this time.Greta sends you her kiss.

"PS.--Miss Naylor has read all this letter (except about the parasol)and there are several things she did not want me to put, so I have copied it without the things, but at the last I have kept that copy myself, so that is why this is smudgy and several words are not spelt well, but all the things are here."Christian read, smiling, but to finish it was like dropping a talisman, and her face clouded.A sudden draught blew her hair about, and from within, Mr.Treffry's cough mingled with the soughing of the wind; the sky was fast blackening.She went indoors, took a pen and began to write:

"MY FRIEND,--Why haven't you written to me? It is so, long to wait.

Uncle says you are in Italy--it is dreadful not to know for certain.

I feel you would have written if you could; and I can't help thinking of all the things that may have happened.I am unhappy.Uncle Nic is ill; he will not confess it, that is his way; but he is very ill.

Though perhaps you will never see this, I must write down all my thoughts.Sometimes I feel that I am brutal to be always thinking about you, scheming how to be with you again, when he is lying there so ill.How good he has always been to me; it is terrible that love should pull one apart so.Surely love should be beautiful, and peaceful, instead of filling me with bitter, wicked thoughts.I love you--and I love him; I feel as if I were torn in two.Why should it be so? Why should the beginning of one life mean the ending of another, one love the destruction of another? I don't understand.