第55章

THE GIRL AND THE HABIT.

HABIT--a tendency or aptitude acquired by custom or frequent repitition.

The critics have assailed every source of inspiration save one.

To that one we are driven for our moral theme.When we levied upon the masters of old they gleefully dug up the parallels to our columns.When we strove to set forth real life they reproached us for trying to imitate Henry George, George Washington, Washington Irving, and Irving Bacheller.We wrote of the West and the East, and they accused us of both Jesse and Henry James.We wrote from our heart--and they said something about a disordered liver.We took a text from Matthew or--er-yes, Deuteronomy, but the preachers were hammering away at the inspiration idea before we could get into type.So, driven to the wall, we go for our subject-matter to the reliable, old, moral, unassailable vade mecum--the unabridged dictionary.

Miss Merriam was cashier at Hinkle's.Hinkle's is one of the big downtown restaurants.It is in what the papers call the "financial district." Each day from 12 o'clock to 2 Hinkle's was full of hungry customers--messenger boys, stenographers, brokers, owners of mining stock, promoters, inventors with patents pending--and also people with money.

The cashiership at Hinkle's was no sinecure.Hinkle egged and toasted and griddle-caked and coffeed a good many customers; and he lunched (as good a word as "dined") many more.It might be said that Hinkle's breakfast crowd was a contingent, but his luncheon patronage amounted to a horde.

Miss Merriam sat on a stool at a desk inclosed on three sides by a strong, high fencing of woven brass wire.Through an arched opening at the bottom you thrust your waiter's check and the money, while your heart went pit-pat.

For Miss Merriam was lovely and capable.She could take 45 cents out of a $2 bill and refuse an offer of marriage before you could --Next!--lost your chance--please don't shove.She could keep cool and collected while she collected your check, give you the correct change, win your heart, indicate the toothpick stand, and rate you to a quarter of a cent better than Bradstreet could to a thousand in less time than it takes to pepper an egg with one of Hinkle's casters.

There is an old and dignified allusion to the "fierce light that beats upon a throne." The light that beats upon the young lady cashier's cage is also something fierce.The other fellow is responsible for the slang.

Every male patron of Hinkle's, from A.D.T.boys up to the curbstone brokers, adored Miss Merriam.When they paid their checks they wooed her with every wile known to Cupid's art.

Between the meshes of the brass railing went smiles, winks, compliments, tender vows, invitations to dinner, sighs, languishing looks and merry banter that was wafted pointedly back by the gifted Miss Merriam.

There is no coign of vantage more effective than the position of young lady cashier.She sits there, easily queen of the court of commerce; she is duchess of dollars and devoirs, countess of compliment; and coin, leading lady of love and luncheon.You take from her a smile and a Canadian dime, and you go your way uncomplaining.You count the cheery word or two that she tosses you as misers count their treasures; and you pocket the change for a five uncomputed.Perhaps the brass-bound inaccessibility multiplies her charms--anyhow, she is a shirt-waisted angel, immaculate, trim, manicured, seductive, bright-eyed, ready, alert--Psyche, Circe, and Ate in one, separating you from your circulating medium after your sirloin medium.

The young men who broke bread at Hinkle's never settled with the cashier without an exchange of badinage and open compliment.

Many of them went to greater lengths and dropped promissory hints of theatre tickets and chocolate.The older spoke plainly of orange blossoms, generally withering the tentative petals by after-allusions to Harlem flats.One broker, who had been squeezed by copper proposed to Miss Merriam more regularly than he ate.

During a brisk luncheon hour Miss Merriam's conversation, while she took money for checks, would run something like this:

"Good morning, Mr.Haskins--sir?--it's natural, thank you--don't be quite so fresh...Hello, Johnny--ten, fifteen, twenty--chase along now or they'll take the letters off your cap...Beg pardon--count it again, please--Oh, don't mention it...Vaudeville?--thanks; not on your moving picture--I was to see Carter in Hedda Gabler on Wednesday night with Mr.Simmons...'Scuse me, I thought that was a quarter...Twenty-five and seventy-five's a dollar--got that ham-and-cabbage habit yet.I see, Billy...Who are you addressing?

--say--you'll get all that's coming to you in a minute...

Oh, fudge! Mr.Bassett--you're always fooling--no--? Well, maybe I'll marry you some day--three, four and sixty-five is five...

Kindly keep them remarks to yourself, if you please...Ten cents?

--'scuse me; the check calls for seventy--well, maybe it is a one instead of a seven...Oh, do you like it that way, Mr.Saunders?--some prefer a pomp; but they say this Cleo de Merody does suit refined features...and ten is fifty...Hike along there, buddy;don't take this for a Coney Island ticket booth...Huh?--why, Macy's--don't it fit nice? Oh, no, it isn't too cool--these light-weight fabrics is all the go this season...Come again, please--that's the third time you've tried to--what?--forget it--that lead quarter is an old friend of mine...Sixty-five?--must have had your salary raised, Mr.Wilson...I seen you on Sixth Avenue Tuesday afternoon, Mr.De Forest--swell?--oh, my!--who is she?...