第92章
'It is generally commercial.I buy and sell on speculation.The world, which is shy of new words, has not yet given it a name.Iam a good deal at present in the South American trade.' She listened, but received no glimmering of an idea from his words.
'When we were engaged everything was as bright as roses with me.'
'Why did you not tell me this before,--so that we might have been more prudent?'
'Such prudence would have been horrid to me.But the fact is that I should not now have spoken to you at all, but that since we left England I have had letters from a sort of partner of mine.In our business things will go astray sometimes.It would be of great service to me if I could learn what are your father's intentions.'
'You want him to give you some money at once.'
'It would not be unusual, dear,--when there is money to be given.But I want you specially to ask him what he himself would propose to do.He knows already that I have taken a home for you and paid for it, and he knows,--But it does not signify going into that.'
'Tell me everything.'
'He is aware that there are many expenses.Of course if he were a poor man there would not be a word about it.I can with absolute truth declare that had he been penniless, it would have made no difference to my suit to you.But it would possibly have made some difference as to our after plans.He is a thorough man of the world, and he must know all that.I am sure he must feel that something is due to you,--and to me as your husband.But he is odd-tempered, and, as I have not spoken to him, he chooses to be silent to me.Now, my darling, you and I cannot afford to wait and see who can be silent the longest.'
'What do you want me to do?'
'To write to him.'
'And ask him for money?'
'Not exactly in that way.I think you should say that we should be glad to know what he intends to do, also saying that a certain sum of money would at present be of use to me.'
'Would it not be better from you? I only ask, Ferdinand.Inever have even spoken to him about money, and of course he would know that you have dictated what I said.'
'No doubt he would.It is natural that I should do so.I hope the time may come when I may write quite freely to your father myself, but hitherto has hardly been courteous to me.Iwould rather that you should write,--if you do not mind it.
Write your own letter, and show it me.If there is anything too much or anything too little I will tell you.'
And so the first lesson was taught.The poor young wife did not at all like the lesson.Even within her own bosom she found no fault with her husband.But she began to understand that the life before her was not to be a life of roses.The first word spoken to her in the train, before it reached Dover, had explained something of this to her.She had felt at once that there would be trouble about money.And now, though she did not at all understand what might be the nature of those troubles, though she had derived no information whatever from her husband's hints about the South American trade, though she was ignorant as ever of his affairs, yet she felt that the troubles would come soon.But never for a moment did it seem to her that he had been unjust in bringing her into troubled waters.They had loved each other, and therefore, whatever might be the troubles, it was right that they should marry each other.There was not a spark of anger against her in her bosom;--but she was unhappy.
He demanded from her the writing of the letter almost immediately after the conversation which has been given above, and of course the letter was written,--written and recopied, for the paragraph about money was, of course, at last of his wording.And she could not make the remainder of the letter pleasant.The feeling that she was making a demand for money on her father ran through it all.But the reader need only see the passage in which Ferdinand Lopez made his demand,--through her hand.
'Ferdinand has been speaking to me about my fortune.' It had gone much against the grain with her to write these words, 'my fortune'.'But I have no fortune,' she said.He insisted however, explaining to her that she was entitled to use these words by her father's undoubted wealth.And so, with an aching heart, she wrote them.'Ferdinand has been speaking to me about my fortune.Of course, I told him I knew nothing, and that as he had never spoken to me about money before our marriage, I had never asked about it.He says that it would be of great service to him to know what are your intentions, and also that he hopes that you may find it convenient to allow him to draw upon you for some portion of it at present.He says that 3,000 pounds would be of great use to him in his business.' That was the paragraph, and the work of writing it was so distasteful to her that she could hardly bring herself to form the letters.It seemed as though she were seizing the advantage of the first moment of freedom to take a violent liberty with her father.
'It is altogether his own fault, my pet,' he said to her.'Ihave the greatest respect in the world for your father, but he has allowed himself to fall into the habit of keeping all his affairs secret from his children; and, of course, as they go into the world, this secrecy must in some degree be invaded.There is precisely the same going on between him and Everett; only Everett is a great deal rougher to him than you are likely to be.He never will let Everett know whether he is to regard himself as a rich man or a poor man.'
'He gives him an allowance.'
'Because he cannot help himself.To you he does not do even as much as that, because he can help himself.I have chosen to leave it to him and he has done nothing.But this is not quite fair, and he must be told so.I don't think he could be told in more dutiful language.'
Emily did not like the idea of telling her father anything which he might not like to hear; but her husband's behests were to her in these, her early married, days, quite imperative.